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#75712 - 07/30/02 11:30 AM Re: Weddings and Such
lonebuffs
Ching Shih


Registered: 05/17/02
Posts: 352
Loc: Boston, MA, USA

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My wedding is in just over two months (EGAD, does the time fly!... I'm pretty sure it was only a few days ago that it was 6 months away!) and we're doing a mix of traditional and non-traditional. For me, it's important that I remain an individual, and while both my father and step-father will be escorting me down the aisle, I will not be "given" away... rather, my father will say I choose to give myself into marriage and do so with the blessing of my family. I've been to too many weddings where the officiant says, "Who gives this woman?" and I always scream in my head, "How can someone else give her!!?? Isn't she her own person??" Well, anyway, we're trying to make the whole affair as personal and fun as possible, but when it comes down to it, the only thing my intended and I really care about is each other, and formalizing the commitment we already have. Admittedly, too, I dig the opportunity to wear a really cool (and, I must boast, very inexpensive) dress for the day. By the way, cat, excellent suggestion on the 69 Love Stories... we're not sure, but I think our first song will be "Nothing Matters When we're Dancing." Bliss.
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#75713 - 07/30/02 02:15 PM Re: Weddings and Such
voiceofreason
Ching Shih


Registered: 04/27/02
Posts: 1257
Loc: Brookline, MA, USA

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Hey, I came across this article; it's about atheist weddings but a lot of it could apply to any kind of non-traditional wedding. http://www.atheists.org/comingout/weddings/atheistweddings.html
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#75714 - 07/30/02 05:21 PM Re: Weddings and Such
Schmu
Ching Shih


Registered: 06/25/02
Posts: 66
Loc: San Francisco, CA

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 Quote:
Originally posted by voiceofreason:
Hey, I came across this article; it's about atheist weddings but a lot of it could apply to any kind of non-traditional wedding. http://www.atheists.org/comingout/weddings/atheistweddings.html


Oh, I could kiss you! This is the kind of information I've been looking for. Not only was this particular article helpful, the additional links on the site were very good as well. I'm so happy now.

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#75715 - 07/31/02 05:05 AM Re: Weddings and Such
marykmac
Ching Shih


Registered: 08/15/00
Posts: 440
Loc: York, UK

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I don't know how many non-Anglican liturgies this is included in, but whenever you go to a marriage ceremony celebrated according to the Book of Common Prayer, all the women in the choir are holding their breath waiting to see whether the bride will promise to obey or not. We were at a wedding recently where the bride did promise to obey, and we all exchanged slightly horrified and disappointed glances, and then the groom said his vows, and he promised to obey as well, which was completely novel. We have visions of their marriage as stalemate, however: "No, dear, it's up to you." "No, sweetheart, whatever you think is best."
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#75716 - 07/31/02 08:31 AM Re: Weddings and Such
ken_m
Ching Shih


Registered: 04/25/02
Posts: 503

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 Quote:
Originally posted by marykmac:
We have visions of their marriage as stalemate, however: "No, dear, it's up to you." "No, sweetheart, whatever you think is best."


Ms._m and I have that exact conversation all the time, and neither of us said anything about obeying in our vows.

It takes us a long time to decide where to go for dinner.

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#75717 - 07/31/02 09:47 AM Re: Weddings and Such
mollym
Ching Shih


Registered: 04/19/02
Posts: 117

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I have a song suggestion -- mr. m and I have somewhat different taste in music, and were having a really hard time coming up with something the other would like. One afternoon at work I suddenly thought "Al Green's version of Let's Stay Together -- lovely song, appropriate sentiments, we were listening to the Pulp Fiction soundtrack a lot the summer we got together." So I went home bursting with the idea, and when mr. m get home I said "I've thought of something..." and he said "Before you tell me, how would you feel about Let's Stay Together?" quite a good omen, I thought.
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#75718 - 07/31/02 10:22 AM Re: Weddings and Such
NataliAnne
Ching Shih


Registered: 01/08/02
Posts: 113
Loc: Montreal

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Friends of mine getting married next month have also decided to use Let's stay together by Al Green. I think its a great choice!
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#75719 - 08/01/02 02:47 PM Re: Weddings and Such
badverb
Ching Shih


Registered: 02/13/01
Posts: 379
Loc: n'yawk

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lonebuffs, my wedding is at the end of September, too ... I can't believe this! The invitations go out this weekend/next Monday.

Except I'm kind of preoccupied because I am having a wee problem with the preparations.

I am a photographer myself, and my very good friend who is also a photographer (and damn good) has just gotten a job much too far away for him to be able to take the pictures at the wedding, which (as the above might lead you to think) is at the very end of September.

Does anyone know a nice, skilled, low-key-but-elegant photographer who lives in or can travel to upstate New York? And won't mind taking very explicit instructions? (I mean, I'm going to try not to say anything about the F-stop and the kind of lenses s/he uses, but it's going to be really. hard. Because I love what I do, and ... aw, heck, it's so hard to explain all this.)

Anyhow, can anyone help?

Edited to add: I really didn't mean to be rude. I hope I don't sound it -- the planning process is getting just the tiniest bit hectic

And I wanted to add, for those of you sending out invites very soon: The U.S. Post Office has not printed out the new "Love" stamps yet (personally, I never really liked them much anyway). What they do have in some areas are bird stamps (these are scarce in Manhattan) and some absolutely beautiful commemorative photography stamps in black and white. Which, I may not need to add, are the ones I have picked out!

[This message has been edited by badverb (edited August 06, 2002).]

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#75720 - 08/06/02 10:47 AM Re: Weddings and Such
badverb
Ching Shih


Registered: 02/13/01
Posts: 379
Loc: n'yawk

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also, in the interests of bumping up the thread, I wanted to tell y'all what we're doing with our sorta pagan ceremony: We're opening the reception with a group candle-lighting ceremony. Mr. B and I will light two tapers, which our usherettes (his niece, my friend) will pass to the people at the outside tables to light their candles with. When they come back to us, we will light our own big pillar candle together.

I am so excited now!

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#75721 - 08/07/02 10:04 PM Re: Weddings and Such
hispanic barbie
Ching Shih


Registered: 05/07/02
Posts: 118
Loc: Nashville TN

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hey- there are some really cool Harry Houdini stamps, which are way better then the love stamps. We used these for our 'come to vegas' invitation we just sent out.
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